


i’m much too young to stay feeling old in my frame

by buckybunnyteeth



Category: Stargate Atlantis
Genre: Coda; Millers Crossing, Established Relationship, F/M, Family Feels, M/M, Not Canon Compliant, ep 4.09 Millers Crossing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-27
Updated: 2018-09-27
Packaged: 2019-07-18 05:27:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,712
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16111793
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/buckybunnyteeth/pseuds/buckybunnyteeth
Summary: “So, are you gonna marry that Katie girl?”“What?!”“You heard me!”Rodney stumbles, half words and mumbles coming out instead of words.“You’ve been dating for over a year now.”“Well, actually- I mean we-”“You think you’re gonna find someone better?”





	i’m much too young to stay feeling old in my frame

 

“I wanted to tell her that I loved her, and not in the complicated way I loved our parents, but in a simple way I never had to think about. I loved her like breathing.”

― Brenna Yovanoff, The Replacement

 

 

“So, are you gonna marry that Katie girl?”

“What?!”

“You heard me!”

Rodney stumbles, half words and mumbles coming out instead of words.

“You’ve been dating for over a year now.”

“Well, actually- I mean we-”

“You think you’re gonna find someone better?”

Rodney stares at his sister in shock, still not completely confident that this conversation is happening. Jeanie looks back at him, expectant and already judgmental.

Rodney really didn’t plan on having this conversation like this.

Well, not that he could plan for being captured by an insane man whose net worth can only be matched by his sense of entitlement and ego. I mean what parent would do that? Inject their child with something that has a ninety percent chance of killing them straight up, rather than making the most of the time they have left with said child, which they sacrificed when they injected her with the god damned nanites in the first place, is there some fucking-thing that he is missing here-

“We broke up actually.”

Jeanie looks at him with a pointedly slack-jawed look of surprise and annoyance.

“She dumped you.”

“No! No, she-she … it was mutual.”

“I’m sure.”

“We didn’t- we had no time for each other and she … she was wonderful and I was too much of a jerk. I could see that my personality was upsetting to her, so I decided to ask her- well he sat down and we-”

“Oh, Rodney,” Jeanie sighs, “I felt so much better knowing you had someone out there.”

“I have a whole city of people constantly annoying me-”

“That’s not what I mean, and you know it!” Jeanie snaps, pointing a finger at him, “You’ve always spent too much time alone, always get lost in your head and you push people away, me included-”

“Jeanie…”

Rodney closes his eyes and sighs. Do they really have to do the whole thing here, with her dying right in front of him and death a certain axe hanging over his head? Why couldn’t this wait?

 _Because death_ is _a certainty, moron._

“I’m…” he sighs again and opens his eyes to meet her expectant gaze, “I’m actually seeing someone else now. So … you know.”

If anything, Jeanie looks more surprised by that than the whole break up thing.

“Who?” she demands, “I mean who could possibly-”

“Okay, alright!” he snaps, “Can we just got back to-”

“Is it Colonel Carter?”

“No!”

“Because you’ve always had a thing for blondes- there was a reason Mindy Clark dyed her hair brown. But Sam is too good for you. No offense.”

Rodney pinches the bridge of his nose. He is literally praying for the jackbooted thugs to burst in here again just, so he doesn’t have to keep being a party to this conversation.

“Is it that new doctor? Um … Dr. Keller! Is it her?”

“No, it’s- I don’t even know her that well.”

“…is it Teyla?”

“Now you’re just being ridiculous!”

Jeanie nods, conceding that there is no way in hell Rodney would be Teyla’s type. She’s like a sister to him anyway. _A sister who is much less annoying_ , he thinks loudly.

“Well I’m out of candidates,” Jeanie sits back and crosses her arms, “Why didn’t you tell me before now?”

“Well, we’re lucky I didn’t! Considering your emails were being monitored by this son of a-”

“Mer,” She says softly, “I thought … I thought we were getting better.”

Rodney looks at her face, her lost and sad expression exactly the same as it had been when they were kids and they were standing in the pews at their mother’s funeral.

“It’s … it’s a man.”

Jeanie’s eyebrows shoot up so fast if it were scientifically possible they would have flown off her face. He stares at him and his stomach rolls, waiting for the damning reply his anxiety says is coming.

He doesn’t look up, not even when he hears Jeanie stands up and comes over to him. He almost jumps out of his skin when she wraps her arms around him and presses her face into the space between his shoulder blades. Just like when they were kids and one of them had a nightmare. Usually him.

“Thank you for telling me, Mer,” she says like the grass-fed hippy she is, but then switches her tone back to kid sister when she says, “You coulda told me sooner.”

Rodney blink against what is absolutely not fresh tears in his eyes.

“I … I didn’t want you to think of me differently.”

Jeanie chuckles and lets go of him. When she comes around and leans on the console next to him she is smiling.

“Trust me, no matter your orientation you’re still the annoying asshole I’ve always loved.”

Rodney smiles at her in return until the emotion becomes too much.

“Can we, uh- we still have the whole-”

Jeanie rolls her eyes.

“Okay. But you are not getting out of talking about this when we get out of here, Mer.”

Rodney holds onto that hope as they dive once again into solving the nanite problem.

Two hours later Jeanie looks up with a cheeky expression and says:

“Is it John?”

“Oh my god, I will pay you to not-”

Their gracious hosts return cuts him off.

 

Getting out of Henry Wallace’s grip turns out to be the easy part.

The nanites cause the problem. Rodney sets himself up to give his life for his sister. And he never plans on telling her that he did.

It takes a lot not to cry in front of John. Or to bearhug the crap out of Todd.

 

Rodney keeps fidgeting with the box in his hands as they stand on Jeanie’s porch, waiting for the door to be answered.

“Stop,” Ronon smacks his hand away from the box.

“Don’t just smack my hand, what makes you think you can-”

“You’ll ruin it. Stop.”

Rodney shoots him a glare but cuts it off quickly when the door opens.

“Hey!” Kaleb grins as he lets them in, “Come in, Jeanie is just finishing up the salad- Uh, Ronon right?”

Ronon nods. Kaleb just looks at him, shooting Rodney looks like he is asking why Ronon is doing here.

“…Uh, good to see you again!”

Rodney rolls his eyes at his brother in laws reinforcement of the friendly Canadian stereotype but says nothing as he follows them inside. They go into the living room where Madison is playing tea party with an array of mismatched toys. A neon pink bear is slumped over in its seat, obviously overcome by the effects of the invisible tea. She looks up in the middle of pouring tea for a giraffe wearing a sun hat.

“Uncle Mer!”

She jumps up and runs over to throw herself into Rodney’s legs, almost knocking him down in the process.

“ _Oof_! Hey lady,” he winces and then covers it with a smile when she looks up at him, “I uh, bought you a present.”

“Really!” she jumps up and down in her excitement, “What is it?”

“Well, that’s the whole point- here just open it.”

He leans down and gives her the box, narrowly avoiding losing one of his fingers when she snatches it out of his grip and starts tearing at the wrapping. Once that barrier is dealt with she throws open the box lid and stares down at what’s inside. Then she slowly lifts it out, revealing a stuffed animal with long fangs and lots of bright orange fur.

“What is it?” she asks.

“It's from the p- the place where I work. The people I bought it from called it a _Clonket_.”

She looks up at him with wide eyes and says;

“I love him.”

Rodney grins.

Beside him, Ronon chuckles and Madison jumps, just now noticing the giant man.

“Hey,” Ronon says, his face forming into its softest version as he kneels down to speak to her, “Remember me?”

Madison clutches her _Clonket_ to her chest and shakes her head.

“My names Ronon. I work with your Uncle.”

“You’re a scientist?”

“Nah.”

“What’s your job?”

“I … I keep the scientists safe.”

Rodney silently thanks him for watering down his job, knowing Jeanie and Kaleb wouldn’t like her knowing the truth. That he’s an unstoppable, wraith killing, badass.

Madison assesses Ronon for a long moment.

“You want to play tea party with me?”

Ronon smiles at her.

“Absolutely.”

Madison skips back to her tiny purple table and dumps a Raggedy Ann doll out of a chair to place her new orange friend on it, and Ronon sits on the floor between the seats of the giraffe and a glitter covered unicorn. Rodney really _really_ wants to take a picture of this to show John.

Madison hands Ronon a teeny tiny cup that’s pink and covered in daisies and then makes him wait as she hovers a matching teapot over it. It looks so tiny in his hands, and even smaller when he brings it up to his mouth to ‘take a sip’ or the ‘tea’.

Ronon is being coerced into wearing a brightly coloured beaded necklace, and Rodney is fumbling his phone out of his pocket when Jeanie come out.

“Meredith!” she beams at him, wearing an honest to god frilly apron and holding a salad tosser, “You’re late, I was just-”

Her words stop when she spots Ronon. She looks from Rodney to Ronon, and back again a few times, her face looking more and more shocked. Then she slams a hand down on Rodney’s shoulder and drags him into the kitchen.

“What?!” Rodney squeaks as he is pushed back first into the refrigerator, “I thought the gift was good! It was checked over for everything if that’s-”

“ _Ronon_!” Jeanie hisses in a whisper, “Your mystery boyfriend is _Ronon_?”

“Yes, well- why are you saying his name like that?”

“How could Ronon ever say yes to- in what world- how?!”

Rodney raises his eyebrows at his sister.

“Wow, thank you so much, sis. That really makes me feel so good about myself.”

Jeanie rolls her eyes.

“He is a giant, handsome, wraith hunting _god_ , Mer,” she hisses, “And you’re … you.”

Rodney glares at her, but then sighs.

“I’m not completely sure how I managed it either,” he confesses, “I mean- it was after a mission where we both almost died and he just out of nowhere pulls me into his room and-”

“Oh god,” Jeanie looks mildly sick, “Please don’t. I really don’t need to know anything about your sex life.”

She shudders at the thought.

“What- I wasn’t- Look yes, him and I are together, but please don’t interrogate him about it. His people were much more reserved about relationships and dating, he absolutely will not kiss me in public, and you should see the look he gives me when I say anything remotely intimate around other people -”

“How in the world has he not brained you by now? You never say the right thing.”

“Oh well, that’s the thing actually. Where Katie would get upset about the things I said he just tells me I’m an idiot and walks away. Or sometimes picks me up and puts me out of the room when I’m really being an ass.”

“…huh.”

“I actually think it’s had a positive effect on my interpersonal skills.”

“You shout at him?”

“Sometimes.”

“Call him names?”

“Well, I mean-”

“Insult his intelligence, looks or skills?”

“Now, hang on a-”

“And he hasn’t ripped your arms off like a peed off Wookie?”

“…No. No, he hasn’t.”

Jeanie looks at him like he’s the biggest idiot she’s ever met.

“Mer, you’ve got to marry him asap.”

“What!”

“You are never, I repeat never going to find anyone on earth that will tolerate you like that.”

“I can’t just, we’ve only been dating for-”

“Well,” a self-amused smile takes over Jeanie’s expression, “I suppose you had to go to another galaxy to find someone who could tolerate you. Oh my god, I wish I could tell people about this.”

“Oh yes, ha ha. It’s all so funny-”

“What’s funny?”

Both he and Jeanie jump in surprise and whirl around to see Ronon standing in the doorway. He has a twinkle in his eye like he knows exactly what they were talking about but is messing with them for the fun of it.

“Um- the salad!” Rodney supplies, rather lamely, “the salad is funny, what with its croutons and- and … lettuce.”

Jeanie nods, looking around awkwardly.

“…Right,” Ronon replies, not convinced in the slightest, “Madison says she’s hungry.”

“Well, she’s in luck because the food is ready!” Jeanie chirps, taking that as an out of the awkward moment, “Would you mind setting the table with Meredith?”

Ronon smiles slyly at the use of Rodney’s first name and nods. Rodney follows him out of the room and as he leaves he sees Jeanie staring at Ronon's ass and glares at her. She just grins.

 

Dinner is … nice.

Its not the same as the strained, stuffy dinners he remembers sharing with his parents. Those were always one wrong remark away from turning into a reprimand, or worse. There was always a hanging sadness, a waiting decent into slamming doors and screaming before days of pointed silence.

There is none of that here.

Jeanie and Kaleb talk about the various activities and groups they are involved in because it’s obvious they can’t talk about Atlantis or the Pegasus galaxy with Madison in the room, Jeanie and he argue good-naturedly about an equation that neither of them has been able to figure out, and Madison commandeers Ronon to tell him absolutely every story, memory and thought she has ever experienced. It's cute, in a way.

Ronon listens to her with all his attention, asking her questions here and there to encourage her to continue talking. She tells him about her friends at school, about the farm she went to last year, the paintings she did earlier in the day, and how she might have a brother or sister soon.

The only real blip in the code comes when Madison asks, out of the blue;

“Do you have a brother or sister?”

Rodney freezes with a fork full of Vegan spaghetti halfway to his mouth. Across from him, Jeanie goes wide-eyed while Kaleb looks between them confused.  He makes spluttering noise, drops his fork and is about to save them to ask Madison what her favourite colour is, he knows its purple but god does he want an out from this-

But Ronon isn’t affected by the question the way that they are.

“I used to,” he says, sombrely but not unkind, “I had three sisters. They aren’t around anymore.”

Madison looks at him with saucer huge eyes.

“Did they go to heaven?”

Ronon frowns and looks to Rodney.

“Heaven?”

“It’s uh- um, it’s a theological afterlife that some people believe in. If you are good and kind you go to heaven where you get to live with all the other good and kind people. Commonly associated with angels, clouds and uh- harps. At- at least in western cultures like America and Canada.”

Ronon nods, still frowning.

“We didn’t believe in heaven where I’m from.”

“What do you believe in?” Madison asks, through a mouthful of pasta.

Ronon thinks about this for a moment and Rodney can see the flash of pain in his eyes. Under the table, he places his hand on Ronon’s knee, and a moment later Ronon wraps it up in one of his own.

“My people believe that when we were finished in the bodies we are in we become something new,” he explains, smiling kindly at Madison so she can’t see his grief, “We become the animals in the sea, the wind, the plants, whatever is the form we are meant to have next. Our souls could return to help our family, to visit our friends, it was …”

 _Wasn’t an end_ , Rodney’s mind fills in for him. He squeezes Ronon's hand and bites his lip.

“I like that,” Madison says, unaware of what an amazing feat she has accomplished, getting Ronon to say so much let alone talk about his dead civilization, “What’s your favourite kind of fish?”

That startles a laugh out of all of them, and the deep rich one that Ronon lets out eases the tension across Rodney’s shoulders.

Ronon and Madison talk about sharks and Rodney goes back to his spaghetti. Jeanie sends him a look that is both grateful and soft, the context of which he doesn’t understand, and Kaleb joins in to tell Ronon about the horrible Shark Fin industry on earth.

Despite the lack of meat and the soy-based dessert they have after, Rodney thinks it’s the best meal he’s ever had.

 

When they leave Madison hugs Ronon and makes him promise to write her letters. She then hugs Rodney and says, in the blunt way that only children can;

“I love my toy. You can write me letters too. I love you uncle Mer.”

And then she runs up the stairs to get ready for bed, leaving Rodney stupefied. She hasn’t said that before. Ronon is raising his likeability across the board.

Kaleb shakes their hands, says that next time he’ll make a vegan chocolate cake, and then follows Madison up the stairs.

Jeanie hugs them both and tells them that she’d better see them without the kidnapping and nanites next time.

They turn to go, but Jeanie grabs him before he can follow Ronon down the garden path.

She pulls him into a fiercer hug and when she speaks she sounds like she’s close to tears.

“I’m so proud of you, Mer.”

He doesn’t understand where this is coming from, but he hugs her back, just as tight.

“I’m proud of you too, Jeanie. Really proud.”

After a long moment of shared proudness, mixed with relief that they got out of their twin kidnappings alive, they break apart and Jeanie whacks him in the arm.

“And don’t think I didn’t see you spitting your tofu into your napkin, jerk.”

She closes the door on Rodney’s spluttering and down on the street, Ronon laughs.

 

Because its not even eight o’clock yet Rodney takes Ronon to a bar he knows sells good beer and the best hot wings he’s ever had in two galaxies. Well, the best hot wings that don’t have citrus products in the recipe.

“Thank you,” he says when he is two beers deep and they are waiting for their wings.

Ronon stops glaring at the hockey game on the tv to look at him.

“For what?”

“I don’t know,” Rodney shrugs, “You were just so good with my family I feel like I should thank you. Madison thinks you’re the coolest person she’s ever met.”

Ronon smirks.

“Yes yes, you probably are the coolest person she’s ever met or ever will,” Rodney rolls his eyes, “But still- thank you for it all.”

Ronon shrugs this time.

“I like your family,” he says as if it’s the simplest thing in the world, “It wasn’t hard.”

Their wings arrive, and Rodney swallows the instinct to thank him for a third time in favor of stuffing his mouth full of their spicy goodness. Ronon chuckles at him and then starts putting them back at the exact same speed. They have a nice meal, with Rodney trying to explain Hockey to Ronon and him only really taking an interest when a couple of players throw off their gloves and start fighting on the ice. It’s a nice end to a good day.

When they leave the bar Ronon walks close to his side as they cross the pitch-dark carpark. So, close their shoulders brush.

“What I said …” Ronon starts and stops, clearing his throat like he’s nervous, “About Sateda and my family-”

“You don’t have to tell me anything else, I-”

“I think … I think my sisters would have liked you.”

Rodney stops walking to look up at Ronon, his heart skipping a beat in his chest.

“No, they wouldn’t.”

Ronon looks down a small smile on his lips.

“Yeah, at first. But after a while, they woulda come around,” Ronon rubs the back of his head and scuffs his heel against the ground, “But uh- … I don’t have a family anymore, not-”

He sighs, and it shudders out, making Rodney’s chest constrict. He wants to wrap his arms around Ronon, but he can’t make his limbs move. He knows this is something Ronon needs to get off his chest.

“-not one here with me, anyway. So, you don’t need to thank me for being part of yours. You really don’t.”

Rodney nods, sniffs back some embarrassingly unmanly tears and throws his arms around him. Ronon grunts in surprise and wraps an arm around Rodney’s shoulders.

“Its been a long week,” Ronon sighs, resting his chin on top of Rodney’s head, “Wanna go home?”

“Oh god, yes.”

Ronon hums and drags him back to the car.

“You know,” Ronon says as he opens Rodney’s door for him, “I’m still mad you got kidnapped.”

“It wasn’t my-”

Ronon stares him down.

“- mostly wasn’t my fault. I could have, potentially, waited for you and John before rushing in and … well, you know.”

Ronon nods and pushes him into the driver’s seat.

“What I was gonna say,” Ronon smirks softly, leaning into the door way to speak softly into Rodney’s ear, “Is that I’m still mad you got kidnapped. And that when we get back to the base I’m going to throw you down on one of those scratchy air force beds and not let you up until the Daedalus comes to get us. Okay?”

Rodney feels his heartbeat pick up and his eyes go wide as one coherent thought streams through his mind;

Jeanie is right. I need to marry him as soon as possible.

“Yep- yes that’s okay- A-Okay, in fact. What are you doing? Get in the car, for the love of god-”

Ronon slams his door closed, but Rodney can still hear him laughing.

**Author's Note:**

> I've been sitting on this for weeks, I rewatched Millers Crossing recently and decided to rewrite it with this ship. I love Katie but she deserved better than how Rodney treated her and her plants.


End file.
